It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
