capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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