i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
