It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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