so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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