; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
