Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She tied me up with her honor cords...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize