you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
