Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
