Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry RomanticRoadkill hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(586): View more from Michigan

On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless

Fav 6 1317 1470
share tweet
(208): View more from Idaho

I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies

Fav 25 8291 922
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?

Fav 15 6469 1210
share tweet
(317): View more from Indiana

she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...

Fav 8 2998 1072
share tweet
(252): View more from North Carolina

it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet

Fav 6 2458 1624
share tweet
(559): View more from California

He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year

Fav 8 1534 961
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...

Fav 3 862 645
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.

Fav 0 61 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(281): View more from Texas

Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.

(713): View more from Texas

As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly

Fav 0 116 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT