how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
