There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
