I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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