if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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