Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Drunk is not a location!
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
