so that wasnt chicken after all
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
