the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize