Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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