She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
