you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
and she was petting her beer can
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
