will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Randomize
