whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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