Too much gin, very little bucket
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
