Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
