How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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