no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We are two peas in an std pod
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
