Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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