u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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