can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
