found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
