she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
