Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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