i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
