Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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