everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
