What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize