I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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