She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
