Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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