3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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