I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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