i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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