i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
