i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
