from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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