Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize