It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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