how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
