this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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