I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
